Science jokes
What did the earthquake say when it was done? Sorry, my fault!
Timmy has 5 apples.
His train is 7 minutes early.
Calculate the mass of the sun.
A NASA scientist is sitting in a bar when a Martian walks in and orders a martini.
The NASA scientist quickly realizes he is dreaming and wakes up. He turns to his wife and tries to explain the dream, but she rolls over and ignores him because she is tired of listening to him.
The NASA scientist begins to sob because his marriage is in shambles. lmao.
What is Hawking's number one song? The Beach Boys: "I Get Around."
The reason why Steven H. died was that someone poisoned his chocolate mousse.
Memes
You’re so lame, you don’t have a superpower!
"Yah, I do!"
Oh yeah? What is it?
"My diaphragm contracts and moves downwards into my chest cavity and my lungs expand!"
That’s breathing, Jim.
"NO IT’S NOT, JACOB, YOU CAN’T PROVE IT!"
What is yellow? The sun ☀️.
Science gets you to the moon.
Religion flies you into buildings.
According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly.
Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.
The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.
- That girl was hot. - She's my cousin!
What did Allan say to William, his sister, when he stepped on his toe? "OWWW Mitosis."
Where did Stephen Hawking go when he wanted to get drunk? The Genius Bar.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost WiFi connection.
August 3rd is the moon of earth, earth, moon, earth, universe.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a dinosaur?
Jurassic Park.
What do you get when the queen farts a noble gas?
What do you get when a dino farts? A blast from the past.
Why are ninja farts so dangerous? They are silent but deadly.
The fact that "Hawkins" rhymes with "walking" and "talking," yet he could never do any of them.
When Stephen Hawking is ill 🤮, do you take him to Curry's PC World or the doctors? 😂😂😂😂
What’s Steven Hawking's fav[orite] food?
WiFi chips or his shoulder?
Chemistry joke: Why did the Superman being normal people when a krypton was at him?
Because krypton is "stable."
What’s one thing smarter than Stephen Hawking? His computer.