Say jokes

When a fat person steps on a scale, it says: “To be continued.”

What did the orphan say to his stepmom?

"I need help."

If I could make someone tell me their last words, they'd say, "Make me."

When your parents say, "We are sorry that you are here," what do you think of that?

I think that you're an accident!

They say making and having friends comes with some benefits. I guess you could say I have friends with benefits.

When I say, "Daddy," my stepbrother raises his head.

What did the Queen Bee say to her bees?

"Beehive yourselves!"

How do you say "nose" in Spanish?

hmm.... No sé.

They say there is strength in numbers. Tell that to the people in the World Trade Center.

What does a cop say when they shoot ginger?

"Orange is the new black."

What did the blind man say the first time he touched sandpaper?

“What in the world did I just read?”

As a straight son, one day I asked my mom, "Have you ever quit something that you did before?" My mom said, "No, I never quit anything." So I asked my when you give a blow job you ever spit, then my mom said, "What did I say? Quitters are for spitters."

What did the cannibal say when his friend fell on the floor?

"5 second rule!"

I believe Alia is a true god because they say in the beginning there was an explosion.

What’s the best thing about making out with dead girls?

They can’t say no.

I used to date this girl only to find out she's a guy.

I guess you can say she had me in a trans.

What’s one thing you can say during a wedding and in bed?

I didn’t know we were having seafood tonight!

I hate it when people say age is only a number. Age is clearly a word.

What did the Pokémon say after having sex?

"My ball was sore!"

What did God say when he made the first woman?

"Where is your dick at?"