Say jokes

People always tell me to say no to drugs, but if I'm talking to drugs, I probably said yes.

Q: What did people say when Kim Kardashian was at the beach?

A: Stop littering!

What did Bill Cosby say on the second date?

"Hi, nice to meet you."

I used to date this girl only to find out she's a guy.

I guess you can say she had me in a trans.

What did God say when he made the first woman?

"Where is your dick at?"

What’s one thing you can say during family dinner and in bed?

"Will there be seconds?"

I hate it when people say age is only a number. Age is clearly a word.

What’s one thing you can say during a wedding and in bed?

I didn’t know we were having seafood tonight!

They say there is strength in numbers. Tell that to the people in the World Trade Center.

I believe Alia is a true god because they say in the beginning there was an explosion.

A guy asks his priest friend what he wants to eat, and the priest says "bad boys." Then his friend asks, "What kebab do you want?" and the priest says, "B Bricked up Caucasian or Asian will do."

Good morning everybody, well I could say that unlike emo kids.

What did the talking rope say to the man?

"Just hang in there."

What did the full glass say to the empty glass? "You look drunk!"

One like and whatever you say in the comments I'll do, but one rule: it can only be 2-4 hours in or out of Gloucestershire and South Gloucestershire.

Say: "eye"

Spell: map

Then say: "enis."

I told a Chinese man, "Which is better, cats or dogs?"

He said, "Dogs."

I said, "Why?"

He said, "Because dogs tasted better than cats."

We split because she would always say I never listen, or something like that.

What did the tree say to the emo kid? Wanna hang?

A guy and his girl just finished making love.

Just as they lay next to each other, the girl asks, "Have you thought about any baby names?"

The guy then takes his condom off and ties it, and says, "Well, probably David Copperfield, if he gets out of this!"