Say jokes

I'm not saying you're annoying. But if rectal herpes were a person, it would be you.

What does Michael Jackson say when he grabs his crotch? I never noticed that before.

What does Michael Jackson say when he gets hard? Ow!

What did Cinderella say to Prince Charming?

"Want to see if it fits?"

Americans leave without saying goodbye, and Russians say goodbye without leaving.

My friend says, "You should try Oreos with water."

Me: No, because my dad actually came back with the milf.

As a straight son, one day I asked my mom, "Have you ever quit something that you did before?" My mom said, "No, I never quit anything." So I asked my when you give a blow job you ever spit, then my mom said, "What did I say? Quitters are for spitters."

When my bro says "YOUR MOM" when I'm talking when I'm at school, and my friend says "YOUR MOM," me punches him;-;

Your mama's so fat that she can’t even talk, even if Kevin says, "Oh my gosh!" 'cause she has a big ass mouth.

If there is a guy in a wheelchair and he is a bully, say, "I’m still standing."

What does a French guy say when he falls off?

Oh no, Eiffel!

Mum finds out child cheats in math test.

Mom says, "There is no cheating in this house."

Child: "Then why did you cheat with my math teacher last night?"

Say what you want about Hitler, he wasn’t all that bad. After all, he killed Hitler.

What did the talking rope say to the man?

"Just hang in there."

What did the tree say to the emo kid? Wanna hang?

A guy who just got robbed says, "I've been hacked, and the hacker ransomware!"

I'm Asian and there is a saying that dogs are man's best friends. They are my best friends because they keep me from starving.

What did the Twin Towers say to each other?

Sorry if that offended anyone.

“I guess we are going down together!”

You also have to learn to say no. For example: “Would you like a piece of cake?” - “No, I would like two.”

What did the cannibal say when his friend fell on the floor?

"5 second rule!"