Road jokes
A guy wakes up one morning and is walking down the road, and he smells fish, and he says, "Good morning, ladies!"
Why did Pinocchio cross the road?
To get to the other lied.
They say that bad things happen to good people.
So if you get run over by a car just know you're a good person.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To go to Chick-fil-A.
Why does an orphan never learn how to drive? Because he has no dad to help him.
Why would the chicken not cross the road?
Because it's too old. (The joke is old.) (The chicken is old.)
What bounces up and down at 100 miles per hour?
A baby tied to the back of a pick up truck.
Why did the panda cross the road to get to the bamboo house?
Why did the camel cross the road?
Because it wanted to get to the bright green grass.
My friend surprised me for my birthday with a book called ‘Road-Kill Recipes’. I did find some roadkill the other day, so I cooked it according to one recipe and it was delicious. I’m just not sure what I should do with the bicycle.
Why did the orphan run into the street? To get to the other side of life.
Why did the rapper cross the road?
To drop some BARS on the other side.
What's the difference between a chicken and me? None, they both don't watch right and left before crossing the road.
Why did the cow cross the road?
'Cause he wanted to go to a moooooooooooooooooooooooovie.
What’s a gay person’s favorite race track?
Rainbow Road.
Q: What did the stop light say to the other stop light?
A: Stop looking, I’m changing!
I pushed a disabled kid down a busy road and yelled out, "Mario Kart!"
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the “shell” station.
What's the difference between a road bump and children crossing the road?
A road bump will make you slow down when you drive over it.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.