A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal". The other goes to a family in Spain, who name him "Juan". Years later Juan sends a picture of himself to his mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
A wife asks her husband: am I pretty or ugly? The husband awnsers her: pretty. The wife responds: thank yo- The husband interrupts her: PRETTY UGLY!
It took Jesus 3 days to respond
Worst lag ever
A mathematics professor arrived home at 3 am drunk...
His wife was up waiting for him...
"You said you'd be home by 11:45!" she yelled
He responded, "No my dear, I said I'd be home at a quarter of 12."
My enemy likes to act like he’s stupid sometimes, and so once he asked me what a sin was, and I responded with, “you.”
I see 2 fighting with 3, 'what's going on?' I ask. 5 responds: The numbers are moving on up.
my mom said hey come over here and I responded to late mom
ALEX RESPOND TO ME PLEASE LOL
Alex you will never belive this!!!!!!!!!! please responded as quick as possible! to my love alex!
My sister is really disrespectful, and her famous words are "Your not my parent!" The next time she says this, I'm going to respond back with, "Your right, because I would have worn a condom to protect from you being born unlike my dad did!"
There were two snakes slithering along when one snake said to the other snake "Are we poisonous?" "Idk why?" The other snake responded "Cause I just bit my tongue!"
Little Johnny was watching TV when he heard the TV say bitch and bastard. He went over to his dad and said, "What is a bitch and bastard?" His dad looked at him suprised and said, "a bitch is a female, a bastard is a mailman." Johnny went back to the TV and heard them say ass and shit, so he goes back to his dad and asks, "What shit and ass mean" His dad says "A shit is shaving creme like what i'm putting on my face and ass is a coat, why don't you bug your mom." Johnny goes back to the TV and hears them say fuck, so johnny goes over to his mom and says to her, "What does fuck mean mom?" She looks over at him and says "Fuck means carving, like what i'm doing to this turkey!" A few minutes later Johnny hears a knock on the door. He walks over and answers it. He then says "Welcome bitch and bastard may I take your ass?" The people, looking horrified, then ask were his parents are. Johnny responds with "My dad is putting shit on his face and my mom is fucking the turkey!"
Adam and eve are going through the garden when Adam suddenly says, "What race are we?" Eve responds with, "Ask God, he will tell you." so adam goes over to a hill and asks, "God, what race are we?" God says, " You are what you are." Adam goes back to Eve and says, "We are white." Eve asks how he knew that. Adam responds with, "If we were black, he would have said 'you is what you is'."
My wife walk in on me cheating on her and said, "How could you cheat on me?!" I said, "She was lying naked on the table what I was supposed to do?" and my wife responded with, "Perform the autopsy."
Hello, I am Alan Shawn Feinstein. I would like to know who the owner of this website "worstjokesever.com" is. I am interested in buying this website. Please respond to me in the comments or email me. Thank you, and keep doing good things.
sailors are coming onto the boardwalk and are met by colonel sanders. he asks them, what is your occupation? they respond we are semen. so he says well you better wash up cause i'm finger licki'n good!
You know how on Snapchat hmu means hit me up? A school posted smu. Nikolas Cruz responded.
A young boy is in a tepee with his father, just after his sister's naming ceremony. Curious to how it works, he asks his dad, "Father, why is my sister's name Tulip?" His father responds, "That is her name because a tulip was the first thing she saw when she first opened her eyes." The boy was still puzzled. "What about big brother Sparrow?" "His name is Sparrow because a sparrow landed on him when he first began walking." The boy finally asked how he was named. "Well, we decided to name you the same way as your sister." The boy nods with understanding, "Thank you, father." "No problem, Two-Dogs-Fucking."
A turtle was walking down the street when suddenly a snail came and robbed him. When the police came he asked what happened, the turtle responded '' I don't know, it all happened so fast''.
