Reproduction

Reproduction jokes

Q. What do you say when your friend has an abortion?

A. May your baby rest in pieces.

What's the most embarrassing thing about locking your keys in the car outside a pregnancy care center?

Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger.

What’s another name for nutting in a woman?

Loading the dishwasher.

What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say when you leave?

"Thanks for coming. Hope you come again soon."

What’s another name for cumming in a woman?

Loading the dishwasher.

What’s the difference between a baby and a sandwich?

You don’t have sex with a sandwich before you eat it.

Hondo's dad and mum went up the hill to do it in the water.

Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a Hondo.

My son caught me masturbating. He asked me, "What are you doing?" and I said, "Don't worry, son, you'll be doing it soon." He asks, "Why is that?" and I said, "My arm's getting tired."

I'm actually against abortion.

Just go to the car wash and tell 'em you ate too much red pasta!