Relationship jokes
Your mom's hot.
Why are women in love with plastic because they had a plastic "galflalflflfalfl?"
I like my couches like my women... Old, used, and big enough to fit 3 men.
"I fancy Hunter, my big sugar daddy," said the orphan, clearly lying.
Little Johnny meets Big Suzy.
Little Johnny and Big Suzy got together.
Little Johnny still regrets getting together with her to this very day.
The end.
Your mom disrespected your dad when he saw your face.
My best friend was recently gunned down in a drive-by shooting and died a virgin, but he wasn’t buried one.
Mom
Bad handjobs are rare. They’re hard to come by.
Roses are red, Foxes are orange, I like your butt, Let me touch it forever.
I love to have sex. And my name is Lex. Which one should I be with next? I really hate my ex. I just saw a huge T Rex, And I think you probably saw this text.
Welcome for the rhyme.
My chocolate babe is calling my name, and now I'm about to get my chocolate freak on.
What’s the best part of having sex with a pregnant woman?
You can have sex and a blow job at the same time.
Knock, knock.
Who is there?
Your Nan.
WHAT? MY NAN IS DEAD!
When it is quiet when you're having sex and you ask your partner to "Do the roar!"
penis.
I like penis.
My girlfriend broke up with me because I quote Linkin Park too much.
But in the end, it doesn’t even matter.
Me: Truth or dare?
Crush: Dare.
Me: I dare you to give me your phone number.
Crush: Umm nevermind, truth.
Me: Ok, what is your phone number?
Oh, ate the cheese? Urmom.
I love you, my new phone! 📲