Why can't an orphan be gay? It has no one to call daddy.
Relationship Jokes
I have an exam next week, so I called my ex and asked if she had any cheating tips.
For some reason, when my mom eats hot dogs, she likes to lick and suck on it first. As a son, can anyone tell me why?
Treat me like a joke, and I will leave you like it's funny.
Guys, help! I need advice to confess to my crush. I'm being for real right now, guys, help!
Bestfriend @3am: I love you.
Me: Love you too.
*wait whatttttttttttttttttttt*
I don't know if this is funny.
My wife said I had no sense of direction... so I packed my sh*t and left.
Me: Good night, everyone.
My friends and family: Night.
Me: *gets in coffin*
My family: *stares at my friends* You aren't going to do something?!?
My friends: *to my family* Nope, this is normal.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not your dad.
Are you a tree? Cuz I’m trying to hang with you. ;)
My wife made electric eel for supper. I was shocked!
Person 1: “Hey, today was great!”
Person 2: “What happened?”
Person 1: “I ran into my ex today.”
Person 2: “What’s so great about that?”
Person 1: “I was in my car.”
I always keep anti-fungal spray with me... because I don't want to share my girlfriend with anyone.
When his dick is really, really small, but you pretend it is so big it hurts so you don’t make him feel bad 'cause he is a nice guy.
My dad and I were fishing one day.
That’s where he met my stepmom.
I would tell a dad joke, but it already left me.
What’s the speed limit in bed?
It’s 68. Once you hit 69, you have to turn back around.
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!
Ever seen the show Naked and Afraid? That’s what I call hide-and-seek with my uncle.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to climb Mt. Dew.
