Mom!
Relationship Jokes
I am sooooooo bored, Gwen, can you please get on, or anybody, since I'm weirdly obsessed with Gwen.
I took my mother-in-law out today...
I love being a sniper.
So my friend died. I was at her casket. I said I'll see you on the other side, so I went to the other side of the casket.
When she says "parents aren't home" so you rush upstairs.
I went to my girlfriend's house one day in Alabama when I met her brother. He said, "Well, I guess there's no more you stuck in the dryer."
A man has been dating a girl forever. He finally says, "I love you." The girl says, "Aww, thanks." The man looks at her, "Are you not gonna say it back?" The girl says, "No, I can’t."
I took my girlfriend to the beach, and a marine biologist thought she was a beluga whale.
Die you potato.
I baked you a pie.
Oh boy, which flavor?
Pie Pie Pie Pie.
Dad, I'm hungry.
Hi hungry, I'm dad.
Why did you name this way?
Why Why Why?
Why does Kermit like Miss Piggy covered in honey? Because he likes sweet and sour pork.
Jk: Jimin, why are you so small?
Jm: Excujjimi?
Jk: No offense, Jim.
Jm: Yah, call me hyung!
Jk: But I'm bigger.
Jm: I'm older!
Jk: I'm the top and you're the bottom, so I don't think it's right to call you hyung.
Jm:......
Build your ex a fire, and they're warm for a day.
Set your ex on fire and hide the smile/evidence.
Peanuts are hard to crack, just like my ex-wife's heart.
Person 1: Yassin has sex with a piece of sex.
Person 2: Nice, can I have some of your balls?
Remember kids, ejaculate, then evacuate.
Mom! (DYM 3)
My ex misses me, but her aim is getting better.
The only people who do yo mama jokes wish they had a mom.
The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn’t talking to me.
Did you know there’s a sex position called “Amazon”? You wait all day and nobody comes.
