Relationship jokes
They say that "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach," but I find it a lot easier to go through the ribcage.
Sister.
My father can take a joke because he made one.
Remember kids, ejaculate, then evacuate.
Hey babe, I’m looking to get 23 years in 23 seconds, can you help?
Are you from Tennessee, because I eat ass.
Don't you hate when you have sex with your teacher, then remember you're home schooled?
I can't believe my friends. They killed themselves without me!
Friend: Do you know him?
Other Friend: Know who?
Friend: My dick!
Spy: Hahaha.
Me: What?
Spy: Time to pick up your mother.
Me: Oh no....
What do you call your son?
An mistake.
A sibling went up to their other sibling and said, "Dad said you're adopted."
The other sibling said, "You are, too."
Then the first sibling goes, "No, I'm not."
And the sibling says, "We're twins."
The other kid goes, "And you're adopted... oh."
Kid: Hey, Dad.
Dad: You're an hour late.
Kid: No, it was two hours. Also, I was working on math.
Dad: By yourself?
Kid: No.
Dad: A boy?
Kid: I was with the teacher.
Why can't melons get married?
Because they cantaloupe.
Connor: Hi Mom.
Mom:
Connor: I forgot I'm adopted to 2 dads!
"Yo mama so... Wait... Whose mother am I speaking of?"
No one has my back like my dad.
What’s the difference between a mother and a girlfriend?
A girlfriend likes a bad boy.
Ur family reunion, a homosexual communion.
I like my coffee like I like my women.