Relationship jokes
Nothing makes a guy happier than when his girlfriend says, “Go and lock the door first...”
A woman walks out of the bathroom, winks at her husband and says, “I shaved down there; you know what that means.”
The husband responds, “Yeah, the drain is clogged.”
What do Boy Scouts and IG models have in common?
They both be fucking sugar daddies.
About a month ago, I was at my best friend’s funeral and I told him, "Bitches always come and go." He looked at me kinda mad, kinda confused, and said, "That’s my mom, dude."
My girlfriend who is a Jehovah's Witness had sex with me so hard, she turned to Christianity.
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Leo is like a cloud... when she disappears, it's a beautiful day.
Slade must be WiFi... because I’m not feeling a CONNECTION.
What's one thing your dad shares with black men? Your sister.
What’s worse than banging your sister?
Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.
You know my first name, but don’t worry about it; you’ll only be screaming my first.
Boy: I'm dead.
Girl: Is that why you're so ugly?
Boy: No, I was just born this way.
I have friends.
My friend jokingly confessed to me she did prostitution (consensual).
She wasn't joking. :0
We are 15....
Yo life so miserable, the adoption center wouldn't sell you, just give you away!
Your mum is so cute that I asked for her number and she said yes, and now we're dating.
Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered, "Y?"
When people say they get ho's: You don't get no ho's, the only ho's you get is in yo draws.
My wife is so fat. After sex, I rolled over twice. I was still on top of the bitch!
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You look like Shrek, And you make me peck.
Pussies and tits have one thing in common: they're both made for kids, but men end up licking or suckling them.