Relationship jokes

Why can't an orphan eat a bag of chips?

Because the chip was family size.

I saw a news ad on TV about a dad coming home after getting milk. I said, "I've never seen that one before!"

All of a guy's sons came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar.

The bartender asks, "Do you have anyone in your family who likes women?"

The man said, "My wife does!"

Todoroki POV: All he can think about is Deku.

I have a secret crush on your momma.

Ur mom.

Oops my bad! 😬

I broke up with my boyfriend and stole his wheelchair.

Guess who came crawling back?

So I had an idea: you and a friend go bar (pub (whatever you call it)) hopping and propose to said friend in each one so everyone buys you free drinks and you get drunk and have a great time.

Man, my brother has a tight, buttered butthole. The veins in my cock throb when he comes over!

Thomas Jefferson’s 80th b-day bash be like:

Jackson: "CALHOUN! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME - IN BED WITH THE CONSTITUTION??"

What do you do if a woman is choking? Pull out a few inches.

I had to go to my friend's house.

I went in her basement and I saw taped mouths that are KIDS in the basement... Is my friend OK???

I was in the bedroom slapping your girl harder than Will at the Oscars.

Why do orphans not like July 24th??

Because it's Parents Day.

My Crandall just be smashing more than you ON DA GIRLS, and he was slapping your girl last night harder than WILL at the OSCARS! ;)

When you're so rich that you can buy anything, you end up getting a cow in your living room. Yeah, anyways, my ex is still in my living room.

Oh, yeah! FRESHFRY fucked a boy!

Dads are boomerangs, I hope.

Knock knock. Who’s there? Ur uncle. What? Is ur RBLX gf?

Why can’t orphans be gay?

Because they don’t have anybody to call “daddy.”