Relationship jokes
Why'd the rubber go flying across the room?
Because it got pissed off!
You: Knock knock. Other person: Who is there? You: Not your parents.
Just 'cause I have a big penis doesn't mean I can't have sex.
I'm Joe Biden's husband.
Everyone likes orphans but their parents.
Women are like blackjack. I’m trying for 21, but I always hit on 9.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfi.
What did the female rapper say when her boyfriend pulled his pants down and exposed his huge balls?
“I like big nuts and I cannot lie!”
I got home one day and a Spanish guy, white guy, black guy told me that your sister knows her meats.
She won a trophy. We blindfolded her, then my sister said, "Yeah, I was blindfolded, and I gave all three of them blowjobs and I had to guess which flavor of the meat it was."
The Trophy said Best Blowjobs. As a brother, I couldn't be prouder.
Hey girl, are you suicide? 'Cause I think of you everyday.
Two wrongs don't make a right. Take your parents as an example.
What do condoms and whores have in common?
Answer: There is a lot that comes in every box.
Men should pay for dates because women have to pay for expensive things like makeup because God didn’t finish their faces.
Why did the orphan become a stripper?
So she could have someone to call daddy.
I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was 5.
Hey, can you tell that a blonde likes you? She only gives you two nights in a row.
Sister: (moaning) Go get Mom, she'd love this!
Me: But Billy's with her right now.
Billy: UGHHHH...MMMMM
Dad: Hurry up Billy, I want to see you for a moment.
A wife and husband had been on a strict diet, and the wife said, "You know, we've been good about our diet. Let's have a cheat night tonight." The wife came home with KFC and Wendy's. The husband came home with Sylvia from the office.
I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
A phone is like parents. Not everyone has one.