Relationship jokes

What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.

Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.

Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.

My stepsister is a big titty goth. Should I tap that?

Why can’t orphans be gay?

Because they have no one to call "daddy."

I would take out the trash, but my mom said you weren't ready!!! XD

I spent 10 hours applying makeup so I could look pretty when I was going to have sex with my partner.

I needn't have bothered.

The next day, it was smeared all over my face.

What's the difference between being gay and straight? Well, it is the hole.

What's the difference between my dad and cancer?

Cancer doesn't leave.

Why did most orphans become prostitutes?

Because they wanted a daddy.

Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick her candy, but Jack got a shock and a mouthful of cock because Jill’s real name was Randy.

What is an orphan’s favorite game? Adopt me.

I hate it when couples get into a little fight and they change their Facebook status to "single." I have fights with my parents, but I don't change my Facebook status to "orphan."

Why can't orphans be gay?

Because they have nobody to call "daddy."

I wasn’t close to my dad when he died. It’s a good thing he stepped on a land mine.

I took my brother's vape, and now he is on the ground gasping for air. He acts like he is dying.

Roses are red, Tomatoes are redder. I think we both know, I like you better.

1. What do you call cheese that's not yours? Nacho cheese.

2. Knock, knock. Who's there? Ash. Ash who? Achoo!

3. How does the ocean say hello? He waves.

4. Why can't Elsa have a balloon? Because she will let it go.

5. What do you call your enemy? You don't call it at all.

I love to have sex. And my name is Lex. Which one should I be with next? I really hate my ex. I just saw a huge T Rex, And I think you probably saw this text.

Welcome for the rhyme.

Kiss a girl on the forehead make her happy for a day.

If you give her anal you'll make her whole weak.

He: I am 60 and I have to slog 12 hours a day to make a living. Do you call it life?

She: I am 28 and still a virgin, do you call it life?

Boyfriend: Let's go to bed.

Girlfriend: No.

Boyfriend: Why?

Girlfriend: Because you want sex.

Boyfriend: No, I don't.

NEXT MINUTE

The man could hear banging.