Relationship jokes

When the husband said "Is your ass so big?" she said "Because I am holding my shit."

Teacher: What's 55 flowers plus 67 flowers?

Kid: A garden?

Teacher: Did I tell you that you're adopted?

Looking for true love. Must be into fun, likes to go out driving, playing the latest catching game and most importantly, must love kids. (PEADOPHILES MUST APPLY WITH HOW MANY KIDS YOU CAN CARRY!)

A girl walks up to her blind friend who she had not seen in a while and says: "Long time no see!"

My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair and guess who came crawling back!

Why can't orphans be gay?

They have nobody to call "Daddy~"

Bully: Ha, guess what?

Nerd: What?

Bully: You are adopted.

Nerd: At least I was wanted!

Moto Moto, stop giving the baby your d*ck!

Are you a gun because I want to live with you?

You know, having an uncle is a good thing sometimes! I get a pair of shoes every week. He says it’s my reward for playing the tickle game with him in his damp and dark basement. It hurts sometimes. But hey, new shoes!

Why did the orphan misbehave in school?

Because the principal couldn't call their parents.

I saw a little girl crying, and I said, "Where are your parents?" That day, I got fired from the orphanage. 🤪

Why do Jedis stay single?

Because they use "divorce" (the Force).

May divorce be with you!

Little Jonny fucked his mum.

Are you a professor? I have a theory about sex that I need to test on someone.

Why do orphans play tennis?

Because it's the only love they get.

My girlfriend sent “a let’s break up text” right when I was done editing our pics.

Roses are red, clovers are green.

I love your legs and what's in between. LOL

Why don't emo girls date emo boys? Cause they've already got a pussy.

Sister, you're ugly.

Other sister: I'm not your reflection.

PS. Sorry if it is not funny.