Relationship jokes

How do you know when you're disliked?

When they always give you the camera for group photos.

Where's my sister's friend? Oh, I forgot, we are in Alabama.

My wife asked me to connect more on my feminine side. So I crashed our car and fucked my trainer.

I saw a news ad on TV about a dad coming home after getting milk. I said, "I've never seen that one before!"

My wife and I have made a difficult choice and have decided we do not want children.

If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.

I told my husband he should embrace his mistakes.

He hugged me!

Love you baby :^

Why do trees always gotta leave me hanging?

A guy asked me what I do for a living.

Now I'm not old enough to get a job, so I said nothing. He asked me again, so I said, "Your wife!" The guy goes to slap me, but his wife is standing right there. She instead slapped me and said, "You swore not to tell!"

Yeah, Eli is hot.

Dentist: “This will hurt a little.”

Patient: “OK.”

Dentist: “I’m having an affair with your wife!”

Mert has no dad.

Raihan fucks Ahmed who fucks Zupporah.

What did the baseball ⚾️ say to the bat?

“We should touch base.”

This orphan showed me a family photo.

But it was just a selfie.

I don't know, I don't have one.

Hey girl, are you my boss? 'Cause you just gave me a raise.

I asked my brother who is autistic how he found his gf. He said on a special website.

The mailman came to drop the mail off.

Me (son): I went and told my mommy that daddy is home.

Mommy tells me, "You got no daddy."

Then I say, "I hear you always call the mailman daddy."

Don't flirt when there is Life Alert!

Edna: Hey there big boy!

Big boy: You need to stop doing this.

A guy walks to his friend's house. His friend says, "Where is your girlfriend?" The guy says, "Meet me at the cemetery in a week."