Relationship jokes
Girl, you are so ugly that when you look in the mirror, it shatters, more than your relationship.
Your hairline and your eyebrows are like your parents, separated.
Why can’t orphans be married?
Because they won’t have their parents' blessings.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your parents.
"Jesus can turn water into wine, but I can turn your mother into mine."
- Sun Tzu, *The Art of Creating War*
Queen Elizabeth came back before your dad did.
Man, I don’t need Viagra when I see Mara!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll be a jaeger, will you be my kaiju?
What do the Twin Towers and my Mom have in common? They both went down on my dad.
A boy in nursery asked a girl out. She ran away crying in fear, so he just went back to teaching.
I keep trying to call my emo friend. They keep hanging up.
Me and my friend are walking, we see a kid. My friend asks him why he's crying and if he lost his parents. He said, "Yeah." I slapped my friend because we were at an orphanage.
Woman: A woman’s life is harder, there is menstruation, periods, birth...
Man: Men have to deal with women.
A male unexploded landmine was in love with a female unexploded landmine, and he said to her...
"Hey, baby, we should bang sometime!"
P.S. My brother made this up when he had no meds... I almost died.
What does ATM stand for?
Answer: Amy’s Terrible Mom.
😂🤣
You twin towers because I'm tryna ram in you tonight.
Blossom: Why are we dating the Rowdyruffs when we're technically siblings?
Bubbles:...
Buttercup: I don't know, but those people over there are lookin' at us weird.
Alabama: 😈
What do orphans and fathers have in common? They both don't have families to go to.
Yo momma's so ugly, when she threw a boomerang, it refused to come back.
My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair. She came crawling back!