Relationship jokes
Girl: Wanna come over to my house?
Orphan: I have to ask if my parents come home.
If 6 guys are in a room with each other, is it technically a 6-pack?
Today was the worst day ever. My ex got ran over by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.
So I went to my friend's house and he told me to make myself at home, so I kicked him out. I don't like visitors.
If your blind girlfriend says you have a big cock, she's probably just pulling your leg.
I ear ass your dad's ass and he likes it.
Your mom and your dad.
I like my men like I like my Alexa:
By my bed and turned on.
I like my men like I like my coffee: black and hot.
Three men walk into a bar. The 1st says, "Hey, how's it going?" The 2nd one says, "Great!" But then the 3rd man says, "Hello, where did my wife go? I swear she was just here!" What happened to the 3rd guy's wife?
Once an orphan got a girlfriend. He regretted it. She left him too.
Girlfriend: Babe, what do you think of our love?
Me: Look at the stars in the sky.
Girlfriend: Aww... it’s infinity, right?
Me: No, it’s a waste of time.
Girlfriend: I’m breaking up with you.
Me: Whatever, when I take out the trash, I think of you.
What did the cupcake tell its frosting?
I’d be muffin without you.
Why can't an orphan be gay?
They don't have anyone to call "daddy."
My wife said she would slam my head into my keyboard if I did not get off video games.
But don't worry I think she was just joking.
Your momma! OHHHHH!
Daddy, harder!
I'm sorry, but your dad left for milk.
Are you adopted?
No.
I mean, who would want you?
When I self-harmed one day, my mother told me that it cut her deep. We both found that very amusing.