Hailey: "Hey Brayden!"
Brayden: "Hey!"
*Music roles around*
*I tell Brayden Hailey likes him*
Brayden: "O_O"
Hailey: *Hides*
So sad </3 xD
My girlfriend said onions were the only foods that make you cry.
Until I threw a watermelon in her face.
How does a depressed couple say goodbye on the phone?
"No, you hang yourself first..."
Why is the orphan cold?
'Cause there's no one to cuddle with.
My current love life is like a god. It’s not real.
My mom said, "Take out the trash," but I couldn't find you.
Don't take my posts seriously, take them like your ex took you—as a joke.
Hi guys, jokes for sister.
So I was listening to a song about "I hate you, are annoying, sister. I'm small and I'm smart," and when I showed it to her, she killed me, and later I was dancing and crying.
Why do orphans not like jokes?
Because they hate your "mom" and "dad" joke because they miss their parents. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Fatherless jokes.
What is the difference between a woman and my fridge?
Only one moans when I put my meat in it.
"You’re the milk to my cookies."
What’s the difference between Geico and a wife?
Geico saves you more.
When your gf tells you to treat her like a queen,
and then you remember you’re French.
Can't have a smoke with my girl after sex, she's asthmatic.
Plus, she's too young to smoke.
A boy walks up to a girl and says, "I would tell you a joke about my dick, but it’s too long."
Then the girl says, "Yeah, I would tell you a joke about my pussy, but you’ll never get it."
Why is Johnson’s baby shampoo the best lubricant for anal sex?
- No more tears.
What do you do if a woman is choking? Pull out a few inches.
My elderly relatives like to tease me at weddings, saying, "You'll be next!"..
They soon stopped though, when I started to do the same to them at funerals.
What do both a hooker and a customer have in common? They come onto each other.
