Opposite day jokes

It's opposite day today. I'm gonna tell an orphan that their parents are here.

What does one orphan say to another orphan on Opposite Day? "Do you want to go home?"

Opposite day be like in doors.

Figure: Finally, I can see.

Eyes: Nnnnnoooo! I'm blind. Figure, I'm sorry I made fun of you all those other times. Please don't make fun of me.

Figure: Ok eye promise eye won't.

Eyes: 😭

11/9 is opposite day. The towers fall on the planes instead of 9/11, way.

My mom told me to help her with the laser, but it was opposite day, so I pushed her down.

She said help, so I kicked her.

Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar? They don't have Father's or Mother's Day.

September 11, bring your plane to work day.

People were talking and asking what's the worst day of the year for them.

Person 1: "The first day of school because I don't like going to school."

Person 2: "Valentine's day because it's too lovey."

Me: "Oh nice, mine is my birthday because it's when I was born."

If you say to someone, "Have a nice day!" it will make them happy. If you say, "Enjoy the next 24 hours," they'll be terrified.

Let's make a joke on how depressing Monday is to ignore how depressing everyday is.