Reaction jokes

One time I saw a manatee all spray painted to look like a tiger. Needless to say, the first thing I yelled was, "OH! THE HUMANATEE!"

Want to hear something that’ll make you smile? Your face muscles.

Ahem... if somebody you don't like, or somebody random just calls you in general,

answer the phone with this:

"Hello, thank you for choosing Mama's Pizzeria/Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, how may I help you?"

or

"Hello, this is David's Orphanage, you make them, we take them, how may I help you?"

Some people's reactions are priceless, and then they wonder about your mental health.

Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction after eating 12-year-old nuts.

Hello! I hope you're having a good day or night! Mind commenting when you laughed the hardest and why? Like if you like this post!

Mom told me to get more in touch with my feminine side. So, I crashed the car.

Why did the brother cross the road? Because the sister farted.

When the people that see you cry, that doesn't mean they miss you. That mean they scared of your onion breath! 🐑💨

Knock knock.

"Who's there?"

Boo.

"Boo who?"

It's just a joke, no need to cry!

When I see James Charles, my popcorn goes pop pop.

I would tell you a science joke, but I know I won't get a reaction.

What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?

A freezer doesn't scream when you put meat inside it.

You're so ugly that blind people cry when you walk past them.

I told a chemist a joke.

No reaction.

What's the difference between a baby and an onion?

I cry when I chop up an onion.

My gf told me she was pregnant, so I punched her in the stomach.

She asked me why the hell I did that. I told her I wanted to let her know I’m pro abortion.

What do a friend and a mouse have in common? They will both be angry if you throw bricks at them.

At school, this gurl was like, "You're ugly!" And I'm like, "Gurl, your mirror cracks the moment you step in front of it."

People might not laugh at my jokes, or have a reaction at all, but I'd explode with euphoria.

Periodically, people might laugh every now and then.

My teacher got so mad at me for making 9/11 jokes, she hit me twice and I said, "Damn, got hit twice!"