Reaction jokes

Your mom is so fat that when she fell on the sidewalk, nobody laughed, but the sidewalk cracked up.

Hello! I hope you're having a good day or night! Mind commenting when you laughed the hardest and why? Like if you like this post!

Yo mama is so ugly that the Grinch fell out when he saw her!

When I see James Charles, my popcorn goes pop pop.

A guy threatened to touch me yesterday...

I was watching my boyfriend's dog while he took a shower. I started playing fetch with him when the ball went over the balcony. He went to get it and fell 10 stories. When I looked down, he appeared to be dead.

My boyfriend loved his dog and I didn't know what to do, so feeling awful, I sat on the couch and waited for him to come back. About three minutes later he got out of the shower. He ordered some food and went to the table to eat when I said, "You know, your dog's been a little depressed lately..."

My sister thinks she's so smart. She said, "Onions are the only food that makes you cry." So I threw a coconut at her.

So I caught my girlfriend masturbating with a carrot. My first reaction was "Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now it’s gonna taste like carrots!"

Brother: I bought my brother a trampoline today, the ungrateful fuck just sat in his wheelchair and cried.

A kid and his dad went to the park. The kid accidentally steps on a cockroach.

They go home immediately and dad gets the scissors. Now the kid has some balls to play with.

A horse walks into a bar.

Several of the patrons quickly get up and leave, realizing the potential danger in the situation.

I have a joke about chemistry, but I don't think it will get a reaction.

What was Jesus' reaction when the first black person was born?

"Holy shit, I burnt one."

My teacher got so mad at me for making 9/11 jokes, she hit me twice and I said, "Damn, got hit twice!"

Want to hear something that’ll make you smile? Your face muscles.

Your mom is so fat Santa Claus came down and said, "Ho ho holy shit!"

If your sisert makes you 100% mad, slap your siert.

I would have told you about a chemistry joke, but I wouldn't get a reaction.

At school, this gurl was like, "You're ugly!" And I'm like, "Gurl, your mirror cracks the moment you step in front of it."

When other people tell a joke, 3/3 people laugh.

When I tell a joke, 1/3 people laugh, but 2/3 people stare into my soul.