Power jokes
There is a man in the hospital. The power went out, and the man was stabbed to death. There are three witnesses: the nurse who was with another patient, the doctor who was reading some paperwork, and The Who who was at the vending machine. Who killed the man?
The mom did, because you can’t use a vending machine when the power's out!
Ah (gas, gas, gas) Ah Do you like my car? Guess you're ready 'cause I'm waiting for you. It's gonna be so exciting. Got this feeling really deep in my soul. Let's get out, I wanna go, come along, get it on. Gonna take my car, gonna sit in. Gonna drive along 'til I get you, 'Cause I'm crazy, hot and ready, but you like it. I wanna race for you (Shall I go now?)
Gas, gas, gas, I'm gonna step on the gas. Tonight, I'll fly (and be your lover) Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll be so quick as a flash And I'll be your hero.
Gas, gas, gas, I'm gonna run as a flash. Tonight, I'll fight (to be the winner) Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm gonna step on the gas And you'll see the big show.
Don't be lazy 'cause I'm burning for you. It's like a hot sensation. Got this power that is taking me out. Yes, I've got a crush on you, ready, now, ready, go. Gonna take my car, gonna sit in. Gonna drive alone 'til I get you, 'Cause I'm crazy, hot and ready, but you like it. I wanna race for you (Shall I go now?)
Gas, gas, gas, I'm gonna step on the gas. Tonight, I'll fly (and be your lover) Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll be so quick as a flash And I'll be your hero.
Gas, gas, gas, I'm gonna run as a flash. Tonight, I'll fight (to be the winner) Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm gonna step on the gas And you'll see the big show.
Gonna take my car, do you like my car? 'Cause I'm crazy, hot and ready, but you like it. I wanna race for you (Shall I go now?)
Gas, gas, gas, I'm gonna step on the gas. Tonight, I'll fly (and be your lover) Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll be so quick as a flash And I'll be your hero.
Gas, gas, gas, I'm gonna run as a flash. Tonight, I'll fight (to be the winner) Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm gonna step on the gas And you'll see the big show.
Gas, gas, gas, Yeah, yeah, yeah Gas, gas, gas, And you'll see the big show. Ah
Stephen Hawking drove too far from the wall and unplugged.
He also forgot to pay the power bill.
If you replaced the boss in Portal with a boy, you would hear Stephen Hawking.
My teacher told me, "You have no idea how powerful this quote is." I looked at her and told her, "You don't know how powerful the shotgun in my bookbag is."
when is it normal to freeze before being raped?
when a policeman rapes you.
Why can black people post offensive jokes about making fun of white people, but white people can't post offensive jokes about making fun of black people? Because white people have white privilege. Does it cycle?
Steven Hawking had dark humor.
Whenever he turned on his laugh effect, it diverted power from his screen brightness.
What did the hairdresser say to the power line?
"Want a power cut?"
What do you call dynamite on steroids? - High Explosive.
Ask someone to call you a bitch. When they do, tell them, "Bitches do as they are told!"
Bees don't sting Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris stings bees.
On a hot summer's day, a famous celebrity tweeted, "It is a beautiful day, and I'm deciding which kid to have fun with today." To which the local priest replied, "I too am deciding which of your kids to have fun with today."
Why did Trump go to Jeffrey's secret Island?
So he could trump that little bitch!
When you see an orphanage bully, remind them that no matter how powerful they are, they will never be as strong as their dads... Oh wait, they don't have a dad.
What is the strongest weapon in India?
The red button (this is a fact).
My joke is your life support getting unplugged because my phone is about to die.
Chuck Norris doesn’t go to heaven; Heaven comes to Chuck Norris. RIP.
Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number. You answered the wrong telephone.
Atheists don't solve exponential equations because they don't believe in higher powers.
Q: What's the difference between rape and marriage?
A: With marriage, you get to keep the screaming woman afterwards.