Politics jokes
Obama got Osama.
Germany does a backflip. America: What is happening?
France: Want a baguette?
USSR: Help!
America and UK are a joke.
They asked JFK Jr. if he wanted to shower before his flight. He said, "No, I'll just wash up on shore!"
What borders on stupidity?
Scotland and the EU.
💡 idea. Start a confidential organization that only recruits via invite. Stockpile heavy duty weapons in an si when the time comes we can defend America from any domestic threat. *just a silly idea*
Why didn't the 6th of Jan go well? Cause the shitty Trump supporters didn't carry out the damn job correctly and let the president down. Also, hang Mike Pence!
Instead of Obama, it was supposed to be Osama. Pretending I got their names mixed up.
Did you hear Biden went to the ER?
He's having a little trouble with his Putin.
Dude: Hey dude guess who I am?
Viewers: Dora.
Trump: No, I am President Trump.
Viewers: Why are you wearing Dora’s clothes and backpack?
Trump: Today we are going to build a wall.
Viewers: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Why are Americans bad at chess? Because they have already lost two towers.
A guy in a wheelchair said, "I stand for Boris." But I think he meant he sat for Boris.
"Proud Boys? More like proud snitches!"
What's worse than having a comedian as president? Having a president that has dementia.
Maga shaman is a vegan, lmao!
What does a Russian do for entertainment?
A nuclear world fair.
Who are cats going to vote for in November? Hillary Kitten.
"You're the bomb"—a compliment in the USA.
An argument in the Middle East.
I can’t remember if I already said this or not. I might have already said this. Also, this is a true story.
So, I’m walking into a store in Amish country, and there’s this guy with a bear trap. Then my mom’s friend says, "This guy’s gonna catch some bears." Then the Amish guy stops, looks around, and whispers, “It’s for democrats.”
So one day, I took a trip to Russia and saw Vladimir Putin walking in the streets without any bodyguards. Seeing as how I looked just like him, we switched places for a few days.
After two days, some officer came up to me and asked if we were going to project блять, and I said yes, and the officer said, "God help us."
So a day later, I heard on the news that every other continent and the moon were destroyed. I then approached the officer and said, "I thought you meant we were having a giant orgy." He said, "We did, and that we were extremely drunk."
Biden 2020.