Police jokes
Woman: "I want coffee, black."
Cop: *takes out gun* "WHERE?!"
The colors red, white, and blue are the colors of freedom. Until they are flashing behind you.
Why did the duck get arrested? For selling quack.
What did one detective say to the other detective?
"Disguise is lookin' suspicious."
Why did the orphan commit crimes? To know what it's like to be wanted.
You know, it's only considered murder if there's a body. Otherwise, it's just a missing person.
So you wanna play like that, ayy? Well, Sydney didn't wanna play like that either, and that's why you got arrested.
A man had 10 dead and bloody babies in the middle of his living room. The police suddenly knocked on his door. What is the hardest thing to hide?
- A boner.
The police gave you a fine for not fixing your ugly hairline.
Wanna hear a joke?
Police brutality.
The woman saw a cute lookin' cop. She had pulled up right next to him and said, "Hey, can I get your number?" He said, "Yeah, it's 911," and drove off.
Cops go to the hood when the shooting range is closed.
Why did the orphan commit a bank robbery?
So he could be wanted.
Wayne Couzens, the police officer who killed Sarah Everard, has been complaining about receiving a whole life tariff for her murder...
I think he should count his blessings. He could have had it worse...
He could have married her!
Boss: You're fired.
Me: *turns in my gun and my badge*
Boss: You're a waiter. Where did you get those?
New BBC Geordie police drama set in Honolulu.
Haway Five O.
A blonde accidentally kills a cop and calls the police.
She exclaims, “Hello, is this 911?”
The other person, “Yes, what is your emergency?”
The blonde answered, “I called to inform you that you’re 910 now.”
A shoplifter tried to rob a grocery store.
He was asked to give an "eggsplanation."
Friends are very important. I have lots of friends in very high places. I hope the police can talk them down!
The cops are still searching for my wife's killer. Luckily, I already fled the country.