What do you take care of after a car crash? The witnesses
The colours red, white and blue are the colours of freedom. Until they are flashing behind you.
Officer sees a man and he is seeing he is having trouble walking so he asked him "sir are you drunk?" The man responds "No sir i'm not drunk." So the Officer asks "how high are you?" And the man responds "no sir, its high how are you."
There was a kidnapping at school.
Don't worry, he woke up.
I find it ironic that the colors red, white and blue stand for freedom..... Until they are flashing behind you!
I saw two men wearing the same clothing and walking together, so I asked both of them if they were gay. They did not hesitate arresting me after I said that.
Why did the orphan commit mass murder?
To be on top of the wanted list.
Why did the coffee file a police report? -- Because it was mugged.
What did the rapist say to his victim. Go ahead call the police we will see who comes first.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
What do you call a special police officer? OFFICER DOWN!
There were once three brothers, Shit, Shut up and Manners. One day Shit got hit by a car. Shut up went to find help at the local police station whilst Manners tried to help Shit. When Shut up got to the police station he says "my brother has just been hit by a car." The policeman replied with "OK then first I need to know your name." "Shut up" "No, I need to know your name." "Shut up." "Excuse me but where are your manners." "Round the corner picking up shit."
Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. The police put out an alert to be on the lookout for the two hardened criminals.
The Big Bang happened 16.8 billion years ago and matter cannot be created or destroyed there for we are all technically 16.8 billion years old so to answer your question officer yes she is of age
You know it's only considered murder if there's a body. Otherwise it's just a missing person.
Jim’s car is swerving all over the road so a cop pulls him over, “Step out of the car” says the cop, “I am going to need you to take a breathalyzer test.” “I can’t”, Jim responds “You see I have very bad asthma, that can set off an attack.” “Alright,” says the cop, “then you’re going to have to take a blood test.” “Can’t do that either,” Jim responds, “I am a hemophiliac, if a wound is opened, I won’t stop bleeding, and I could bleed to death.” “Ok,” the cop answers “then I will need a urine sample.” “Sorry,” says Jim “I also have diabetes, that could push my sugar count really low.” “Fine, so just come on out, and walk a straight line for me.” “Can’t do that either” responds Jim. “Why not?” Demanded the exasperated cop. “Well, because I’m drunk!”
I had a huge crush on this girl when I was eight, one recess we met together on the playground and she brought me to the corner of the playground, that was my first kiss and from there it got serious. I told my parents a week later and they freaked out, called the police and they aressted my crush. I miss Mrs. Johnson
My friend was a victim of a school shooting once but he couldnt tell if they were in the library because of the suppressor on his ar
chuck Norris get`s pulled over by cop and the cop gets a ticket
Two police officers crash their car into a tree. After a moment of silence, one of them says, "Wow, that's got to be the fastest we've ever gotten to an accident site."
