Personal jokes
What do you call a black person in a swimming pool?
Coco Pops.
God: You're gonna have 2 parents.
Orphan: Double it and give it to the next person.
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
Why can’t a blind person be a teacher? Because they can’t control their pupils.
I walked in on my little sister when she was naked.
The thing I have to say is that my little sister is a big sister with big tits & ass with juicy lips upstairs & downstairs. I say whoever is going to be my brother-in-law is going to be a very happy person.
me in my pics
What do you call a bald person on fire?
A fried egg.
"What do you call a person who is afraid of Santa Claus?"
"Claustrophobic!"
What do you get if a disabled person falls off a building? Mashed potatoes.
What do you call a Chinese person with 1 leg? Tie Son Whu.
Everyone always has a special person in their life someday, but I think yours got ran over by a bus.
I was the person that flew into the Twin Towers. I have two friends that are both twins, and whenever they speak, I tell them to shut up because if they don't, I'll make myself explode in them.
"Oh, you’re still talking? I thought background noise was supposed to fade out after a while. Must be tough waking up every day knowing your personality was a failed experiment."
What do you call a person who keeps making jokes about rappers?
An annoying prick whose black dad left him as a kid.
I'm doing a new thing where you say an object in the comments, and I will try to make a joke based off the object.
If you are interested, you can submit an object in the comments.
I will give the person credit each joke I do.
What's a smart person's favorite candy? Nerds! :D
Why did the suicidal person cross the road? He was waiting for a car.
You're the type of person to wash your hands after a shower.
Regular depressed person: I'm depressed, so I'll go see a therapist.
Me: I'm depressed, so I won't do anything about it, work on many projects at the same time, destroying my sanity slowly while relying on caffeine and pills as my only way to take down my headaches, and making memes about it online to help myself cope with the pain.
A person walks into the bar and said, "Hey barman, get my son a drink and tell him his dad is dead."
Who said that?
Bus driver: Please give your seat to the white person.
Rosa Parks: Ok.