Personal jokes
If a black person calls you a cracker, let them say it. You can say things they can't say, like, "Thanks for the warning, officer!"
Me: Knock, knock.
Another person (OP): OP: Who's there? Me: Hatch. OP: Hatch who? Me: Bless you =) OP: But I didn't sneeze. Me: You just don't get a joke, do you?
- The emo went to give the tree a high five, but the emo was left hanging.
- How did the gay person die? Homicide.
- Why did the emo get kicked out of the amusement park? He was cutting in line.
- When does a joke turn into a dad joke? When it leaves and never comes back.
- I cried when my dad chopped onions. Onions was such a good dog.
- I have happy memories building sandcastles with my dad, until my mom took his urn away.
- How is the person over there different from cancer? His dad didn't beat cancer.
When you want Pringles, but a fat person was eating them, there were only three left, sweety.
What's the difference between a blind person and an orphan?
They both can't see their parents.
What is the email password of a black person?
"watermelon"
What is a gay person’s favourite meal?
Willy con carne.
Paralyzed Man: *gets up* I’m out of here!
Blind Man: Did that paralyzed man just get up?
Deaf Man: Did that Blind Man see that paralyzed man get up?
Mute Man: Did that deaf man just hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
Dead Man: Did that mute man just say did that deaf man just hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
“Normal” Man: Did that dead man hear the mute man say did that deaf man hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
Doctor: *calls 911*
911 service: 911 what’s your emergency?
Doctor: Yes, uh, a “normal” person just said that did that dead man just hear a mute man say did that deaf man just hear the blind man see a paralyzed man get up?
911 service: *hangs up*
Person 1: How many people has Michael Jackson fingered?
Person 2: Dunno, what’s the minor population?
What do you call a disabled Chinese person?
Sum Ting Wong.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair?
Anything they can't catch you.
What do you get if a disabled person falls off a building? Mashed potatoes.
What do you call a person who doesn't masturbate?
A liar.
A man was walking home but felt tired, so took a short cut through the cemetery. He then heard a tap, tap, then out of the corner of his eye, he saw a man with a hammer hitting the tombstone. The man said, "You scared me. I thought you were a ghost." The other person mumbled, "They spelled my name wrong."
Same old boring ass day, until a person with Parkinson's fainted and got everyone's attention.
He really shook things up today.
What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.
MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]
The last words of a depressive person are: "Yay, Freedom."
What's one of the worst motivational things to say to a suicidal person?
“Hang in there!”
What did God say to the black person?
"Oops, I burned one."😳
Not racist, just funny.
I'm such a good babysitter because the last person I babysat was so flat.