Personal jokes
What is a gay person’s favourite meal?
Willy con carne.
Paralyzed Man: *gets up* I’m out of here!
Blind Man: Did that paralyzed man just get up?
Deaf Man: Did that Blind Man see that paralyzed man get up?
Mute Man: Did that deaf man just hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
Dead Man: Did that mute man just say did that deaf man just hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
“Normal” Man: Did that dead man hear the mute man say did that deaf man hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
Doctor: *calls 911*
911 service: 911 what’s your emergency?
Doctor: Yes, uh, a “normal” person just said that did that dead man just hear a mute man say did that deaf man just hear the blind man see a paralyzed man get up?
911 service: *hangs up*
Person 1: How many people has Michael Jackson fingered?
Person 2: Dunno, what’s the minor population?
What do you call a disabled Chinese person?
Sum Ting Wong.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair?
Anything they can't catch you.
What do you get if a disabled person falls off a building? Mashed potatoes.
What do you call a person who doesn't masturbate?
A liar.
A man was walking home but felt tired, so took a short cut through the cemetery. He then heard a tap, tap, then out of the corner of his eye, he saw a man with a hammer hitting the tombstone. The man said, "You scared me. I thought you were a ghost." The other person mumbled, "They spelled my name wrong."
Same old boring ass day, until a person with Parkinson's fainted and got everyone's attention.
He really shook things up today.
What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.
MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]
The last words of a depressive person are: "Yay, Freedom."
What's one of the worst motivational things to say to a suicidal person?
“Hang in there!”
What did God say to the black person?
"Oops, I burned one."😳
Not racist, just funny.
I'm such a good babysitter because the last person I babysat was so flat.
what's a depressed person's favorite game?
hangman
What do you call a depressed person holding a knife?
Freedom yay! (so funny ikr)
If a person kills their counselor, does that mean that they don't need therapy anymore?
What's the worst thing to happen to a Japanese person in WW2... being drafted as a kamikaze pilot, or existing with a Fat Man or Little Boy?
So who did it? the I.S.S. teacher said.
1 hour before:
So let me get...
Random person: Wait, what? You BROKE UP WITH HER!
Me: I SWEAR, JHONNY, THIS IS THE 3RD TIME YOU BUTT INTO MY CONVERSATION! SO... HERE... YOU... GO! *punches*
The last words from a depressive person are: "I finally see a train!"