Two blondes fell in a hole and one asked, "It's dark in here, isn't it?" and the other one says, "I don't know, I can't see."
I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday. A week later, he told me it was the most violent book he ever read.
This one kid I knew had Down syndrome, and he turned a mirror upside down trying to get rid of it.
When someone has an imaginary friend, you call them weird and crazy.
But when a group of people have an imaginary friend, you call it religion. :)
If I had a dollar for every gender, I would have 2 dollars and a bunch of counterfeits.
Why did the legless kid think he won a race?
Because everybody already left.
What do you call someone who points out the obvious? Someone who points out the obvious.
Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Unnecessary.
I spy with my little eye nothing because I only have two normal-sized eyes.
Why can't blind people eat fish?
Because it's sea food.
I've just started reading my first ever Braille horror story, and I think that something scary is about to happen. I can feel it.
I just found out I'm colorblind. It came out of the yellow.
I have just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman. It's very rewarding, but quite challenging.
Took me ages to get her husband's voice right.
You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.
If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.
Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"
Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."
A blind man once told me he smokes a lot because he has nothing to look forward to. Well, let's just say that I see his point.
So a blind man walks into a bar.
At least he thinks so.
