People

People jokes

Height

Why aren’t short people allowed to be mentors?

Because you can’t look up to them.

Parent

Today on a drive, I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the people living there if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.

My parents are the worst.

Pakistan

People say that Pakistan is a terrorist nation...

Guys, it's not true, even Osama bin Laden lived there peacefully for 6 years.

Gas

Why is Hitler better than Biden?

Because Hitler gave his people gas for free.

Memes

Pet

Why do white people own a lot of pets?

Because they're not allowed to own people anymore.

Dwarf

Times are hard at the moment for people on disability benefits. I’ve got a friend who’s a dwarf...

...and he’s struggling to put food on the table.

Fact

Hey, people don't fly with suicide jokes.

In fact, they hang with them!

Satan

I have a huge thought: if Satan punishes people who are bad, doesn't that make him good?

Million

Millions of people are doing the exact same thing as you are right now.

Party

Some people said that JFK had big parties. Some even would say they were *mind blowing*.

Stroke

What do people that can only use half their face and wankers have in common?

They have both had a few strokes.

Time

People wear chokers, and I'm a choker too, because I tried to choke myself 6 times.

Darth Vader

Why does Darth Vader always choke people?

Because he wants them to feel what his Sith Lord does to him in bed.

Intolerance

French

There are only 2 things I hate in this world:

1. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures. 2. The French.

Difference

Twin Towers

What's the difference between a joke and the Twin Towers? People don't laugh at my jokes.

Terrorist

Two terrorists walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What can I get you?"

The terrorists both say, "A beer."

The bartender overhears them talking about how they will kill 300 people and a donkey. The bartender says, "Why a donkey?"

One terrorist says, "See, I told you no one would care about the people!"