People

People jokes

what do blind people and orphans have in conman? they both cant see they're parents...

I'm going to open up a respite home for people with Alzheimer's.

I think I'll call it "The Vegetable Patch."

Are people still mad at Hasan from that dog incident? All he wanted to do was become the world’s first lightningbender.

Why is it so hard to find people defending suicide in any discussion?

Because they are really committed to their cause.

Special

I'm going to make a city just for people with special needs.

I'll call it Downtown.

Donald Trump is to white Americans as O.J. Simpson is to black Americans. They will never choose to convict these people even if they murdered or raped.

Michael Jackson

What are Michael Jackson's favorite sodas? Yoo-hoo-hoo and Mountain Dew-hoo-hoo. What cola company should people get to keep him at bay? Pep-see-hee.

Twin Towers

You know how people say white men can’t jump? Well, you should check the 9/11 footage.

Twin Towers

What's the difference between a joke and the Twin Towers? People don't laugh at my jokes.

Twin Towers

Fat people are like the Twin Towers. Once they go down, they don’t come back up.

French

There are only 2 things I hate in this world:

1. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures. 2. The French.

Q. What do you get when you cross Vince Li with a bus? A. A whole lot of people who wished they'd missed the bus that day.

Yo mama so fat...

...people in Florida start buying flood insurance when they see her waddling toward the ocean.

Dark Humor

I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.

Why do old people swallow popcorn kernels?

To make their cremation more entertaining when they die.

Why are people born in December, January, and February easy to get along with?

They're cool and chill.