People jokes
I would like to die like my Islamic father, in his sleep, but not like the rest of the people in the plane or those in those identical towers.
I think the military shouldn’t allow trans people, because all they'd do is switch sides.
A policeman just knocked on my door and told me my dogs are chasing people on bikes. That’s ridiculous! My dogs don’t even own bikes!
When you're driving past a graveyard say: "Wow, people were just dying to get in there."
Two simple steps to get 15,000 people to follow you:
Step 1: Buy a bottle of water (doesn't matter the size).
Step 2: Run through Africa with that bottle of water.
Perfect! Now you got yourself half the population there following you!
I see some objects over there... oh, never mind, that's a woman.
You know every time we think of sex, an angel dies.
We ran out of dead people hundreds of years ago.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We Are Family.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
You're so fat, when people see you running, they can't help but yell out, "Keep running!"
Why was everybody so tired on April 1st? Because they just finished a March of 31 days!
Some of the most convincing people you'll ever listen to are born liars; usually they're called politicians.
Orphans are the best people to bully. They have no parents.
Why are cigarettes good for the environment?
They kill people.
Guys, stop making jokes about blind people, they might s... never mind, continue.
Why do people misplace 9/11 with emo kids? They both have a high death count.
Orphans are like vegans, no one ever remembers the nice ones.
Some people are such treasures that you sometimes just wanna bury them.
Ayo, who's online :')
Beautiful people should read this quote: "God gave you beauty but not brains."
People have been telling me that you can get things for free now.
The other day I saw a sign saying "FREE PALESTINE."