Pedophile jokes
Q: How are Clocks like Pedophiles? A: They both stop at 12.
What has ten children crying, naked, and screaming for their parents?
My big green pedo machine.
Why are there adoption centers? Because it's a market for pedophiles.
A pedophile pulls up to little Jonny, lowers his window and asks, "hey little boy, if I give you a lolly, will you come in my car?" Little Jonny replies, "Give me the whole packet and I’ll come in your mouth."
What does a pedophile and a light switch have in common?
They both get turned on by children.
You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?
Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
Have you heard about the pedophile who was found guilty of robbery?
- He robbed children of their innocence.
What do pedophiles and a SpongeBob intro have in common?
Are you ready kids?
When a kid says, "I'm a pedophile," it means that he has a crush on one of his classmates.
When an adult says it, he is accused as a rapper.
What are the similarities between a pedophile and a 9/11 plane?
They both came from behind and crushed them.
What is the perfect job for a pedophile?
A physical doctor for kids.
How can you be friends with a pedophile that's a musician?
B minor.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite type of candy?
A: Loli-pops.
I'm 43 and my date is 19. A man rudely comes up to our table and calls me a pedophile. I told him to fuck off, this is our 10th anniversary.
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?
He said he was awfully touched!
Why do a pedophile love Halloween?
Free delivery.
What do pedophiles do when they wake up?
Turn on the child safety lock on the car.
What's a pedophile's favorite cooking ingredient?...... Fresh meat.
Billy moved in with 69 pedophiles when he was 8. Many "tears" came across his cheeks.