Pedophile jokes
What does a pedophile and a light switch have in common?
They both get turned on by children.
You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?
Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
Have you heard about the pedophile who was found guilty of robbery?
- He robbed children of their innocence.
What do pedophiles and a SpongeBob intro have in common?
Are you ready kids?
When a kid says, "I'm a pedophile," it means that he has a crush on one of his classmates.
When an adult says it, he is accused as a rapper.
What are the similarities between a pedophile and a 9/11 plane?
They both came from behind and crushed them.
What is the perfect job for a pedophile?
A physical doctor for kids.
How can you be friends with a pedophile that's a musician?
B minor.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite type of candy?
A: Loli-pops.
I'm 43 and my date is 19. A man rudely comes up to our table and calls me a pedophile. I told him to fuck off, this is our 10th anniversary.
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?
He said he was awfully touched!
Why do a pedophile love Halloween?
Free delivery.
What do pedophiles do when they wake up?
Turn on the child safety lock on the car.
What's a pedophile's favorite cooking ingredient?...... Fresh meat.
Billy moved in with 69 pedophiles when he was 8. Many "tears" came across his cheeks.
How do pedophiles follow the law?
They drive it slow in the school zone.
What do pedophiles and Sandy Hook have in common?
Shooting up schoolchildren.
Two gay guys, two lesbians, and two pedophiles have a race.
What is the order of finish?
1. Lesbians. Doing 69 the whole way.
2. Pedophiles. Coming in a little behind.
3. Gay guys. Still packing their shit.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I know a pedophile,
And he says he knows you.