What do pedophiles do when they wake up?
Turn on the child safety lock on the car.
What's a pedophile's favorite cooking ingredient?...... Fresh meat.
Billy moved in with 69 pedophiles when he was 8. Many "tears" came across his cheeks.
What do pedophiles and Sandy Hook have in common?
Shooting up schoolchildren.
Roses are red Violets are blue I know a pedophile And he says he knows you
What's the number 1 cause of pedophilia?
Sexy kids.
What's the difference between me calling my girlfriend a pedophile and her calling me one?
Oh wait, I am because she's 10.
Say what you will of pedophiles, but you can't ignore their problem with immature ejaculation.
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and ten 6-year-olds?
I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
Man: I know how to please a woman. Woman: Then please leave me alone, you ugly two-faced hypocrite.
Man: I want to give myself to you. Woman: Sorry, I don’t like ugly peasants.
Man: Your hair colour is fabulous. Woman: I hate your hair colour, though.
Man: You look like a dream. Woman: Then open your ugly eyes and stop sleeping, hypocrite!
Man: I can tell that you want me. Woman: Yes, I want you dead.
R.I.P
Man: Hey, baby, what’s your sign? Woman: F*** you, pedophile!
Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services for pedophiles.
Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down, you little peasant.
Man: What’s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? Every other woman I see looks ugly. Bleuch! Woman: How dare you!
Man: Haven’t I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore. I saw you playing with boxes in the store room and saying "I AM KING OF THE WORLD!"
"You gotta bleed before you teeth."
- Santa Claus