Pedophile jokes
Say what you will about pedophiles. At least they drive slowly through school zones.
What is a pedophile's favorite planet?
Uranus.
What kind of club is every parent afraid of their kid joining?
The Mikey Jackson club.
How do you spell the name of the most dangerous pedophile?
M-I-C-H-A-E-L J-O-S-E-P-H J-A-C-K-S-O-N
What does a pedophile mostly pound on a piano?
A minor.
What does a pedophile call an orphanage?
A supermarket.
Why do pedophiles always lose a race?
Because they come in a little behind.
What do you call a virgin kid locked in a room with a pedophile? Past tense.
My wife called me a pedo. That's a big word for a 6 year old.
The daughter of an incestuous pedophile goes into the living room where he is watching TV and asks him if she can borrow the car that evening.
"Sure honey! If you suck my dick!"
So she gets down on him but something is wrong. She pops her head up and says: "Dad! This tastes like shit!"
"Oh yeah, I forgot," says the father. "I already gave your brother the car for tonight."
1) What was Techno's reaction when he died?
2) Where did all the orphans go?
PS: In case you don't get it, it's a pedophile joke, cuz he is one!
If you hate pedophiles, grow up.
Whatβs the worst part of being a pedophile?
Getting the blood out of your clown suit.
A guy gets home from work to see his girlfriend packing, and he asks her why she is packing. The girl says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile." The guy goes, "A pedophile?" And she says, "Yes." The guy goes, "That's a big word for a 12-year-old."
What do you call a sneaky child molester?
Incogpedo.
Why is it so hard to choose between buying a Subaru or a Volvo? Because youβre deciding whether you want to look like a rapist or a pedophile.
What is a pedophile's favorite piano note?
A Minor.
Stop hating on pedophiles. At least they're good babysitters.
What's the similarity between pedophiles and school shooters?
They both shoot when they see kids.
What is a pedophileβs favorite part about Halloween?
Free delivery.
I just saw people writing "Zoophile," "Ailurophile," and "Dendrophilia" in their bios. I thought this was cool, but when I wrote "Necrophile" and "Pedophile," I don't know why people started hating me as if I did something wrong. I was just trying to be cool like them, man.