Pedophile jokes
What do you call a sneaky child molester?
Incogpedo.
Why is it so hard to choose between buying a Subaru or a Volvo? Because you’re deciding whether you want to look like a rapist or a pedophile.
What is a pedophile's favorite piano note?
A Minor.
Stop hating on pedophiles. At least they're good babysitters.
What's the similarity between pedophiles and school shooters?
They both shoot when they see kids.
What is a pedophile’s favorite part about Halloween?
Free delivery.
I just saw people writing "Zoophile," "Ailurophile," and "Dendrophilia" in their bios. I thought this was cool, but when I wrote "Necrophile" and "Pedophile," I don't know why people started hating me as if I did something wrong. I was just trying to be cool like them, man.
If I'm racist for voting Trump, then you're a pedophile for voting Biden.
What’s a pedophile’s favorite band? Kids Bop.
Why do orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”!
What do pedophiles call children in wheelchairs?
"Meals on Wheels."
How do people grade pedophiles?
1st grade to 8th grade.
(I know it's orphan jokes but still)
Why are pedophiles good at playing guitar?
Because they are good at fingering A minor.
Why do pedophiles come in last place for every race... because they are always in the back (if you know what I mean)?
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a dead pedophile? Nothing.
Q: What is the difference between Austin Matthews and a priest?
A: One looks like a pedophile and one is a pedophile.
EatDatPussy445, aka Deyione Scott-Wilson Eason, aka Bryant Turman Emerson Moreland, is a pedophile, and he is in Las Vegas right now. Go, go, go, catch him!
How do pedophiles get kids to suck their d**k?
They spray paint it like candy 🍬.
What’s the worst thing about being a pedophile?
Fitting it in.
What’s a pedophile’s favorite type of garden?
A KinderGarden.