Parent jokes

Q: What type of flowers do orphans hate? A: Mums.

What is an orphan's least favorite holiday?

Christmas, they wish they'd get parents.

Why do orphans like the number seven? It's lucky, so maybe their parents will come back.

I was walking in a park today and a little girl I asked, "Where are your parents?" She said, "Gone. My dad went to go get the milk and never came back," and I said, "Oof."

How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?

Tell him to clap until his parents come home.

Poles are as straight as adopted kids' parents.

I got two cups of milk. One for me and one for my son.

We both drank them at the same time and tried not to puke. I won, since my son is face first on the table with his blood all over.

Mommy?

Bully: How’s your girlfriend?

Kid: I don’t have one. How are your parents?

Bully: *cries*

Kid: *Walks out of the orphanage*

What do orphans in Batman have in common? They'll never see their parents again.

How to make an orphan's feet bleed? Make them run in place until their parents get them.

Why can't an orphan have sex?

They have no one to call "daddy."

Why can't emos come out of the closet to their parents?

Because they won't be there to stick around.

What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? The Parent Trap.

Harry Potter is now Harry Orphan.

People shouldn't worry about how orphans would feel reading these jokes. It's not like they have parents to buy them a phone or computer to see them, or even a place to charge them even if they did have one.

Kid: Hey, why am I an orphan?

Adult: I don't know, ask your parents.

I burned an orphan's hand and then they said, "You will pay for this."

Me: "What are you going to do? Tell your parents?"

I called an orphan's house, saying: "Are your parents home yet?"

He started crying.

A person told an orphan to not move; otherwise, they would kill their parents. What did the orphan do?

It danced its a** off.