Parent jokes
Why did my parents walk to the other side?
...Why?
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come home.
Who named their daughter Macadamia?
A couple of nuts.
Poles are as straight as adopted kids' parents.
I was walking in a park today and a little girl I asked, "Where are your parents?" She said, "Gone. My dad went to go get the milk and never came back," and I said, "Oof."
Bully: How’s your girlfriend?
Kid: I don’t have one. How are your parents?
Bully: *cries*
Kid: *Walks out of the orphanage*
I got two cups of milk. One for me and one for my son.
We both drank them at the same time and tried not to puke. I won, since my son is face first on the table with his blood all over.
Mommy?
What do orphans in Batman have in common? They'll never see their parents again.
Harry Potter is now Harry Orphan.
How to make an orphan's feet bleed? Make them run in place until their parents get them.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? The Parent Trap.
Why can't an orphan have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy."
Bully: *Bullies kid*
Orphan: Stop!! *Cries*
Bully: What are you gonna do? Tell your parents?? XD
Orphan: :/
Why do orphans hate any milk?
Their dad did not come back for 10 years. Oh, sorry, he got lost in the store! 🤧
Why can't emos come out of the closet to their parents?
Because they won't be there to stick around.
People shouldn't worry about how orphans would feel reading these jokes. It's not like they have parents to buy them a phone or computer to see them, or even a place to charge them even if they did have one.
I burned an orphan's hand and then they said, "You will pay for this."
Me: "What are you going to do? Tell your parents?"
I called an orphan's house, saying: "Are your parents home yet?"
He started crying.
A person told an orphan to not move; otherwise, they would kill their parents. What did the orphan do?
It danced its a** off.