Ever heard of the show "Naked and Afraid"? That's what I call hide-and-seek with my uncle.
Child Abuse Jokes
What's a pedophile's favorite type of garden?
A kindergarden.
What did the pedophile say when he got out of prison?
I feel like a kid again.
"Hee hee touched me."
What do Michael Jackson and a Playstation have in common? They both get turned on by kids.
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap? "Just beat it, just beat it."
Apparently, as a 4-year-old, Hitler was saved from drowning in the river Passau by a local priest.
Goes to show once more that a lot of problems would be solved if priests could just keep their hands off kids.
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and ten 6-year-olds?
I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?
Must be more than 9 because my basement is still dark.
What's harder than steel?
Michel Jackson in an orphanage.
Johnny Depp to a 15-year-old girl: "Wow, look at that sexy body! Savvy!"
Michael Jackson, when talking about a 6-year-old boy: "The boy is mine! That doggone boy is mine! Don't waste your time...."
Donald Trump, Bill Clinton, and Jeffrey Epstein entering and exclaiming, "Wow, this place is more fun than the Playboy Mansion!"
A pedophile was holding a bag of chocolates and then approached a little girl at the park.
"Hey little girl! If you give me a teeny-tiny kissy-kiss on the tip of my wee-wee, I'll give you a piece of my chocolate!"
The little girl replies, "If I suck your whole cock, can I have the whole bag?"
what did the pedophile say to the kid?
"Roses are red, my name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van."
Kelly Clarkson may be able to shed her weight [through pills], but she will never be able to shed the fact that she admitted herself that she molested her children when they were toddlers.
What place has more boys than the Catholic Church? Michael Jackson's bedroom.
What does a pedophile mostly pound on a piano?
A minor.
Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding got together back in the day for a horse racing venture. Tonya says, "I'll handle the handicapping, you go ride the 3-year-olds."
What's a child abuser's favorite song?
"Just Beat It!"
Little girls are like basic math. If they're under 13, you do them in your head.
Nobody:
Michael Jackson: giving kids a free cream pie.