Parent

Parent jokes

Wordplay

2 views ·

Did you know that "girlfriend" at the end, it starts with "end." So does "boyfriend," and "friend" have "end" at the end of it, but "family" at the end it "ily" I love you.

Orphan

Why can't orphans go to family restaurants?

Because they don't have a family to go with.

Dad

10 views ·

I woke up one night to a strange noise, and when I went to investigate what it was, I found out that it was coming from my parents' room.

I looked inside and counted, ok one, two, three finger men and my mom, so nothing out of the ordinary, so then I checked my sister's room, and I counted 4 other women in the room, but then I realized that the sound was coming from right in front of me. It was my dad giving me a BJ the whole time.

Boy

2 views ·

Someone telling a joke:

Boy: "My parents are dead."

Girl: "My grandad is too."

Orphan who listened to it: "That joke is dead!"

Person who told the joke: "So is your family!"

Abortion

5 views ·

Want to hear an abortion joke, or any joke for that matter? You have that option, and you can thank your mother for that.

But that's a question that will never be heard by an aborted unborn baby, whose only option was death. And that's no joke.

Height

3 views ·

You're so short, I bet your parents left you at home most times when they went to the pool because they're scared you'll drown in the kiddie pool.

Orphan

An orphan goes up to someone. The guy says, "Where are your parents?"

The orphan says, "Why do you think I'm wearing ripped pyjamas?"

Grade

1 view ·

When you get home and see your parents with your grades in their hands.

Twenty minutes later, they're slapping you with the belt.

Orphan

A bully told an orphan to cry to his parents, so he did.

His adoptive parents were very supportive about the situation, and everything was settled. He died in an accident a day later.

Orphan

Why didn’t the orphan play baseball?

Because I took the bat and swung it at their kneecaps, and now they can’t run. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

Orphan

2 views ·

Can an orphan child be arrested for vandalism, or will the officers ask for their parents to talk to?

Orphan

Some kid with parents: "Knock, knock."

Orphan: "Who's there?"

Some kid with parents: "Not your parents."