Pants jokes
Donald Trump travels back in time to talk to his 10-year-old self.
When he sees himself, he says, "Do you see me? I am you, but almost 70 years older."
His 10-year-old self asks him, "Am I going to be famous?"
Trump replies, "Oh yeah, I became president of the United States. Not once. Twice!"
10-year-old Donald was shocked. But he became even more shocked when he heard the next sentence from his current self: "And now take off your pants!"
What is 6-inch long, in every men's pants or hands, and girls want?
- A smartphone, freak.
I had a steering wheel down my pants, and I tell you what, it was driving my balls crazy!
Have you seen all the pants with crazy designs on them? I mean, britches be crazy!
If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, does that mean your pants are tucked into your shirt?
lol so so so true
Why was the belt placed under arrest?
For holding up a pair of pants. 🤣
Why does Johnny Sins cover his pants, but it doesn't work?
Because the long, hard thing can't chirp down.
Tell it to your parents and friends!
Jonny went to Disney and they had sour balls. He asked the cashier for some and he pulled down his pants.
A boy couldn't walk normally because his pants were huge, and when he went to school, the people there made so many jokes about him that he died.
IT'S NOT TRUE, JUST A FAKE JOKE, DON'T WORRY!
Your Mom is so friking fat, that when she ripped her pants and went to the seamster, they said, "We don't sew curtains!"
Why was the belt arrested? Because it held up pants.
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? - In case he got a hole in one.
Jack and Jill went up to an abandoned house.
Jack drank too much and unzipped his fly. Jack said, "You know you wanna." Jill said, "No." So Jack locked both of them in the house and put a gag in Jill's mouth, tied her to a bed. He ripped off her dress and underwear. He took off his pants and his underwear too, then put on a condom. He then put a pill in her mouth and made her swallow. One minute later she was asleep. He took off her gag and mounted himself on her, then stuck his "candystick" in her mouth, next her fanny. Then his condom broke, but he was too drunk to notice. Nine months later a baby's born and Jack's in jail as the father.
Lil Johnny looked in his pants and couldn’t find his fish, so he started to yell out, "Lil fishy, lil fishy, lil fishy!" They called child support and sent the parents to jail for putting a fish up a child’s butt.
Poopy pants! Ha! Got 'em! Use Code Fred_5001 in the Fortnite item shop.
Jack took Jill up a hill to have a picnic, but Jack and Jill got drunk. They then Jill unzipped Jack's fly, then said, "You know you want me to."
He said yes, so she took off her dress and bra. Jack took his pants and shirt off too. They both went in the well together and played a game: Jack's candy stick in Jill's candy stick. Next, Jill was sucking Jack's candy stick while Jack licked and sucked her candy stick, then Jill sat on Jack's candy stick while making out.
What’s a ghost’s favorite type of pants?
BOO-TY JEANS!
Wife: I think these pants are getting too small for me!
Husband: Don't worry, maybe you are just bad at laundry.
What do lady dogs (bitches) wear to work?
Pant suits.
I told my cousin since we're not blood-related our parents would let us date.
Her pants were on fire.