Pants jokes
An alien walks into a bar. There is a guy sitting next to him, and the alien touches his shoulder.
The man says, "Do that one more time and I'll run you over." The alien does it again and gets ran over. They get back in the bar and he touches him again. The man says, "Do that again and I'll chop your dick off." He touches him again. The man pulls the alien's pants down and pulls out his knife. He was astonished at what he found. There was nothing there! He looks up at the alien and looks at his finger and fainted.
A man walks over to a little boy and asks, "Wanna see my tattoo of a bunny?"
The little boy replies with, "Yes please, I love bunnies!"
The man proceeds to pull his pants down and said, "Can you see it yet?"
The little boy curious says, "No, where is it?"
The man says, "Dig a little deeper, he runs into the hole when he gets scared!"
lol so so so true
*Sniffs kids*
Relatable 🗿🗣️🔥
Peanut Butter
Community talk
uwu senpai *shits pants cutely*
my moms trying to slut shame me for shit i dindt do like... you came home so many times with so many idffrent guys, sometimes more than one guy you stole fuckgin handcuffs from me you had a kid on caollage btw cause you couldnt keep your dick out of your pants then procceded to have more who you obvously shouldnt have and when your bfs here, he makes it clear you flirt with other guys you littearly fuck someone like daily so i dont want to hear it but if im a slut, like mother, like fucking daughter.
(As per Cosmo's request)
Jack opened his drying eyes, awoken by a piercing ray of sunlight shining through crooked blinds. A gentle smell wafted in from the corner of what his temporarily blinded eyes knew to be a dilapidated kitchen. It was the one good thing about his life, that smell. He closed his eyes once more and awaited his call.
“Jacky, breakfast time!” beckoned that oh-so-familiar girlish voice. “Oh, sil… Read more