Laundry jokes
Why canβt the employee tell dirty laundry jokes?
Because they always come out clean.
Why is Martin Luther King so bad at laundry?
He won't separate the whites from the colors...
Why was the Chinese laundry joke not funny? It had no irony.
Why is the day you do laundry, cook, clean, iron, and so on called a day off?
I started beating my washing machine because it wasn't working, my wife started crying.
Do you get jealous of your clothes when they hang from the line?
What do my clothes and a depressed person not have in common?
My clothes don't hang themselves...
What is the difference between a washing machine and a hooker?
I can put a load in the washing machine without it following me.
What do you do when a person with epilepsy gets seizures in the bathtub? Throw in some laundry.
Why are washers better than babies?
Washers don't cry when you put a load in them.
What goes in dry and comes out wet and has white stuff at the end?
Q: What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in the bathtub?
A: Throw in some laundry.
How are wet clothes and a depressed person alike? One gets hung up to dry, the other gets hung up to die.
What's the toughest stain to wash off a little boy's underpants?
Michael Jackson's lipstick.
How are laundry and Michael Jackson related?
They both got bleached!
A blonde drops off her dress to the dry cleaners.
The lady says, "Come again!"
The blonde says, "No, it's toothpaste this time."
How do you know a woman is blind?
Because she canβt see the kitchen or the laundry.
What's a person with Down syndrome's favorite detergent?
Downy.
What's the most optimistic blood type? B+.
What disease causes wrinkled clothes? An iron deficiency.
A young peasant coming from the field with his scythe on his shoulder notices an attractive young woman that was doing the laundry in a mountain stream, perched on some rocks near a waterfall.
The guy stops and leans against his scythe, fascinated by the young girl's beauty.
After minutes of watching her, she loses her balance, slips on a rock and falls all the way down, crushing her head on the white rocks.
Thoughtful, he puts his scythe back on his shoulder and walks away, saying to himself "Damn, another washing machine destroyed by limestone!"