Otherness jokes
I drove past Wendy’s the other day. No other stores were open, so I asked, “Wendy’s openin’ then?”
What did one plane say to the other? "Let's fly!"
What does one piece of toilet paper say to the other?
"I'm wiped!"
My mom gave my friend a blow job for good luck on his job interview, then my mom gave my other friend a blow job for his interview, and they both got the job. Now who needs good luck? Just ask my mom. My mom is a good luck charm.
Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Phew, it's hot in here." The other muffin says, "OMG, a talking muffin!"
VAPING IS ALSO BAD
What do orphans and broken up couples have in common?
They can't see each other anymore.
What did the Emo kid say to the other Emo kid?
Wait! Don’t leave me hangin’!
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
What does a baby computer call his father? Data!
What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the golfer change his pants? Because he got a hole in one!
Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy!
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying “Ooh, I love how smooth it is.”
What do you call two homeless people throwing rocks at each other?
A pillow fight.
Hrhfgsfabcke then the other guy said, "Potato."
What did one cat say to the other? Happy "meow"!
Two friends were hanging out with each other next to a tree.
Too bad only one was standing. :)
Question: What is the difference between a morbid joke and a dark joke?
Answer: One is 10 babies in a trash can; the other is a baby in 10 trash cans.
"Go big or go home," that’s what some people say.
"Go loud and proud," that’s what other people say.
"Go out with a big, loud bang!" that’s what I say.
Why is Peter Pan always flying? He Neverlands!
Where do sheep go to get their hair cut? The baa-baa shop.
Why did Adele cross the road? To sing, “Hello from the other side!”
How do trees access the internet? They log in.
Did you get them? Me neither. I mean, it is worst jokes ever. I'm kidding, I actually do understand them.
One twin tower had a girlfriend. The other twin tower had the same girlfriend, so they both went down.
Why do gay men want to eat each other's meat because meat is meat, and man has to eat meat?
What did the emo kid say to the other?
"I like ya cut, G."
What do Emos say to each other?
"I like your cuts, G."
What did one chair say to the other?
"I'm so bummed out!"