I’m not calling you a slut, I’m calling you a penny.
Two-faced, worthless, and in everyone’s pants!
What's the difference between football and rape? Women don't like football.
I lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome.
I want my first time to be special.
There are 3 Genders.
1: Man
2: Woman
3: Mentally ill.
A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde walk into a bar.
They were having a chat when the bartender asked them about their opinions on elements.
The redhead says, “I love gold because I can buy a lot of cars with it.”
The brunette says, “I would prefer platinum because it is more valuable than gold and can buy you more cars.”
The blonde says, “I have 2 bags of silicon and you should see the cars outside my house.”
My son wore his new "Go Vegan" Hoodie for the first time today, and already he's been verbally abused as well as being punched, kicked, & spat on!!!!
And he's not even left the house yet!!!
The most unfunny joke ever made.
1273 please kill me, everyone hates me.
Five out of six people agree that Russian Roulette is safe.
I hate it when you say your life is a joke because a joke actually has meaning.
There's nothing quite like being told I'm wrong by someone who depends on me for food, clothing, and shelter.
Wade, you're a joke. The worst joke.
Hoped this would be a safer, more fun place to talk to my BP friends, but I guess not.
I've also learned that some people think "worst jokes ever" = "terrible unfunny jokes that make light of people who died horribly or otherwise suffered" instead of things like "why did the chicken cross the road?"-type jokes.
Maybe I'm just too old at this point.
Yo mama so ugly, just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yes, let's go bury it."
Why do all of Oliver Anthony's songs sound like "shit"?
Answer: Because he sucks!
My girlfriend's a two, but she's turning three tomorrow.
@everyone.. what's so funny is that JIT thinks he's so "cool" and that everyone is "amazed" about him hating on people who is wayyy above him on the roster.
The pathetic part is that he hates on everyone else's family and relationships when 100% of us have a WAYY better one than he will ever deserve. He was born pathetic, and will die pathetic. So JIT, please tell me what it's like to be such a coward?
I'm offended.
- Liberals
I noticed my friend's hairline yesterday. I could tell it was a Supercuts hair salon haircut, so how I could tell was 'cuz it was super alright, super lame.
How do you anger a democrat?
Don't tell him the truth.
Sodomising a physically challenged homophobic heterosexual white male is better than the smallest act of kindness.
