Opinion jokes
A pair of Newfoundlanders, watching TV, saw endless big-budget advertisements for mass-produced American beer.
One Newfie turns to the other and says, "They say that stuff is the biggest seller in the States, but I don't see what the big deal is." So they buy a bottle, pour it into a plain jar and decide to get an expert opinion.
They send a sample to a lab in St. John's to have it analyzed.
A day later, the lab results come back: "Your horse has diabetes."
I say we shouldn’t do any jokes about dogs cause dogs are the best, but cats suck.
I think my butt looks flat, but my boyfriend seems to think the opposite. I told him to be deadass with me.
Today I was asked if I was in favor of legalizing prostitution.
I admit I haven't given it much of a thot.
I just read in the news that tons of Americans are sending their old clothes to poor people in Africa.
Seems like a waste of time in my opinion. I've never seen an African with a 52 inch waist.
Haters are hating. I'm still alluring, but I couldn't give a fuck cus this site is dying and boring.
A UN survey asked the following: Please, in your honest opinion, could you give your thoughts on the food shortages in the rest of the world?
It was a failure because:
South Americans don’t know the word “please.”
Eastern Europeans don’t know the word “honest.”
Middle Easterns don’t know the word “opinion.”
Balkans don’t know the word “give.”
Chinese don’t know the word “thoughts.”
Africans don’t know the word “food.”
Western Europeans don’t know the word “shortage.”
Americans don’t know the words “the rest of the world.”
Then they simply explained “just donate healthy food to the global south to help.” But that still didn’t sit right with everyone, because Israelis do not know the word “donate,” and Pacific Islanders do not know the words “healthy food.”
Guys, should I do it? You know what I mean.
What type of tea does the Social Justice Warrior avoid?
Reality.
What comment did the United States Senator Kamla Harris make when one of her 64% blue dog democrat constituents called her incompetent?
"Sometimes I sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits!"
The USA guaranteeing freedom of speech is the biggest joke I've heard... Tell that to the people who were almost killed because their cars had "NASCAR Sucks" and "Country and Western is rubbish" on them!
What's more stupid than rapper and booty jokes?
NOTHING!
I hate autistic kids and ADHD people because they are stupid, special, retarded, brainless freaks, and they are stupid.
Two terrorists walk into a bar.
The bartender asks what they are talking about. Terrorist 1 says, "We are going to kill 14k people and a donkey."
The Bartender asks, "Why a donkey?"
Then Terrorist 2 says, "See, I told you no one would care about the 14k people."
Some people are such "treasures" that you just want to bury them.
If I agreed with Leo, then that wouldn’t solve anything. It would just make BOTH of us dumb.
The only thing shittier than rapeboats rhymes are his jokes.
If Slade were a vegetable, he’d be a BRUSSELS SPROUT... small, bitter, and NOBODY wants him at the table.
If I found BlessedBrian's jokes FUNNY, I would be just as retarded as HIM.
I’m trying to see things from LEO’S perspective... but I just can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.