One jokes

A man walks into a bar carrying a big chunk of asphalt and says to the bartender, “Make mine a double Scotch and one more for the road.”

One tonsil said to the other tonsil, “We must be in San Juan Capistrano, here comes another swallow.”

Dentist said I grind in my sleep... he a real one for that.

One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"

One, I grow some som more, yea, I am 4. I'm Caillou, I'm Caillou, I'm Caillou, that's me.

What’s an orphan’s least favorite drink?

Milk, because no one came back with any.

One day my mom told me not to be an actor. I said, "But mommy, I will make a lot of money!"

Morbius is definitely one of the movies ever made. One of the movies of all time.

I just gotta come out and say it: I like miners, and I don’t care what y’all think. I mean the fact that they are risking their lives just to make ours a little easier is amazing. I’ve always wanted to marry one, to be honest. Y’all need to give more respect to the mining ⛏ community.

How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But you need 5000 Soviet troops in case he goes on strike!

Why do golfers bring a spare pair of socks?

In case they get a hole in one.

Sorry man, but I got to say one thing. You know when a bully in a movie walks to you, then they walk up to you, and they smell you and say, "What are you doing?"

A guy walks up to a girl. He says, "Hey, you want a poker? I’ve got one."

What is the difference between a tall kid and an orphan? One is tall enough that their parents can see them.

Okay, Gwen, I'll be offline for a while... so if anyone by my name types anything, it's a fake. The only way you know it's me is if I say one of my nicknames. Okay, so yeah, take care of my account while I'm gone. BYE!!!!

Which one's super super corny?

1. What's blue and not heavy? (🤔) Light blue.

2. What's blue and super hard to see?

Dark blue. (🤔)

Treon: I don't care about Vorkie.

Amber: You should, she could be a great person for the company.

Treon: We don't need another one, we got 100 people in here, no need. Now, Amber, please just go make yourself useful.

Amber: Fine!!!!!

I got one of those.

What's the difference between a cunnilinguist and a Ritz?

One is a snack cracker.

The other, a crack snacker.

What is the difference between cunnilingus and a confused Parisian tourist?

One lapses into French, the other Frenches into laps.