Knock knock! Who's there? Stripper. Stripper who? Stripper down!
What do you call a Barbie doll that’s wearing scrubs?
A plastic surgeon. 😷
Rapboat says he has a rap career. Wrap career more like, wrapping burgers at McDonald's.
Couldn't believe how much of a bad mood my work mate was in this morning. So I decided to ask him what was the matter and if everything was OK with his wife, Flo.
He then broke down crying and said when he got home the night before, he caught his wife in bed with the plumber. I tried to console him as best as I could, but he just couldn't get over flow.
A fireman, a policeman, and a carpenter went on a fishing trip. The fireman and the policeman both have the same father but different mothers, and they are half-brothers. But the fireman and the carpenter have the same mother and father, but they are not brothers. How is this possible?
Leave you answer in the comments. The answer will be revealed in 24 hours.
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon.
3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.”
4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river.
6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.
7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.
8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves.
9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.
10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.
11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”).
12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.
14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball.
16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
I'm thinking of getting a job as a gardener--pushing up the daisies!
What is it called when an art teacher has a heart attack?
An art attack!
What do you call two brunettes and a blonde in the NFL?
Two tight ends and a wide receiver!
I asked the librarian if they had any books on anxiety.
She replied with, "Won't you worry a lot about returning it late?"
Why do asses make terrible spies?
Because they always CRACK under pressure.
Why did the rapper become a teacher?
Because they had a knack for dropping KNOWLEDGE.
What do you call a prostitute in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
What do you call a rapper who can't keep a beat?
A RAPPER-TAP-TAP!
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because he was always COOKING UP RHYMES!
Why did the rapper become a fisherman?
Because he wanted to reel in the BEST HOOKS.
Why don't rappers struggle with geometry?
Because they have all the angles covered.
What do you call a rapper who's also a pirate?
Captain Rhyme.
I walked in a sushi bar, and the sushi chef looked very o-fish-all!
How many Lowe’s could Rob Lowe rob if Rob Lowe could rob Lowe’s?
