A man walks into a bar.
Then he walks into a Pole.
Then the Pole says, "I surrender, Heil Hitler!"
What’s the best part about being a circumcision doctor?
The pay is good and you also get to keep the tips!
How is a priest like a wristwatch?
They both start at 12.
What do you call an Eskimo stripper?
A frosty-tute.
What do you call a prostitute in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
What do the initials UAW stand for?
United Awesome Whores.
What do you call a rapper who works at the BANK?
Lil Teller.
What does a gynecologist and delivery driver have in common?
Whenever they’re hungry, they can just scrape a little cheese off the top of the box.
I hate my job—all I do is crush cans all day. It’s soda pressing.
After an unsuccessful harvest, why did the farmer decide to try a career in music?
Because he had a ton of sick beets.
A genealogist looks at the family tree.
A gynecologist looks up the family bush.
There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. I love working at an orphanage.
What do you call a happy cowboy? A jolly rancher.
What do strippers and butter have in common?
Both spread for bread.
Why did the rapper become a locksmith?
Because he always had the KEYS!
Why don't rappers struggle with geometry?
Because they have all the angles covered.
Why do asses make terrible spies?
Because they always CRACK under pressure.
Why do rappers make great fishermen?
They always have the best HOOKS.
I used to be a baker, but I decided to quit my job and stick my dough inside WOMEN’S bakeries.
What do you call a rapper who's also a pirate?
Captain Rhyme.
