To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now
A thief walks up to a man in a suit and pulls out a gun. The Thief says: "Give me your money." The man in the suit turns around surprised. He raises his hands and says: "But, wait! You can't do that, I am a Congressman!" The thief replies: "Oh, sorry. Give me MY money."
What's the difference between a amateur thief and a professional thief?
The amateur thief says, "Give me all your money!" The professional thief says, "Sign here please."
Some people think prison is one word, but to robbers, it's a whole sentence.
To the guy who stole my depression medication, I hope you're happy
Why did the skeleton not rob the bank?
He did not have the guts!
What’s the difference between a thief and a pervert??
One will snatch your watch, the other will watch your snatch
why is the thief so good at basketball? because he can shoot, steal, and run
So I got asked why I suddenly started wearing a beret and I said, well you never know when you need to pick a lock
I stole one's balls
When the police caught him stealing the batteries he got immediately charged !
Why can’t you kidnap an orphan
Because you can’t steal what was never wanted in the first place.
Robin Hood [hands over stolen fortune]: here you are, my poor friend
Friend: wow thanks, i'm rich!
Robin [narrows eyes]: you're what
Why does Waldo wear stripes?
Cause he doesn't want to be spotted.
Why did the orphan rob the bank. To be wanted
If i had 10 dyno nuggies and Jamal tried to take one i would have ten dyno nuggies and Jamal's head
Did you hear about the dwarf that had his wallet stolen. Just how low can you get.
Are you sure your father isn't a thief? Because he stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.
(To a thief) If you like taking things, hbu take my life.
We see the movie Aladdin, and Abu steals more than Aladdin, I’m surprised that Abu hasn’t got killed yet.
